Most of you who read this know that I am a pastor. I love being a pastor, it is my passion and I know that I am fulfilling the calling God has placed on my life. In short, I truly did “surrender” (to use that appropriate but rarely used old term) to God’s call and am striving to serve him faithfully in the local church. I am ecstatic when I see the gospel take root. Recently, a young father who attends our church approached me and asked to be baptized and discipled, for instance. I am watching the gospel transform him, and it’s beautiful.
However, the most discouraging aspects of the pastorate include those times when the gospel doesn’t transform. When otherwise godly men and women do ungodly things, it is disappointing and difficult to bear. Sometimes grown men act like children and mothers act like babies, husbands act like irresponsible college kids, and teenagers act like the world around them.
When these things happen, my heart breaks. It breaks for my people who I love dearly. It breaks for the lost who see the name of Christ marred. It breaks for Christ who’s death has freed us from sin when I see people return like “dogs to their own vomit.”Of course, we must be reminded that sanctification is a process and that no one is perfect in this life, but for me, it is still difficult to deal with. For those of you who struggle as I do, I’d like to give you some practical steps to help you deal and cope.
- Pray. God can and does work, and we need him to work in situations when his word and will is ignored.
- Share your disappointment with a trusted confidant. This may be your wife or an out-of-town friend. We need to be able to confide in others and share our disappointments, this will reduce the temptation to bitterness. NOTE: don’t use this as a license to gossip.
- Be pro-active. Confront your brother or sister in love with the Word of God. God has commanded us to practice discipline.
- Preach the gospel. Confronting with the Word should include both a clear picture of the wrong committed and of the atoning work of Christ. Sin and despair must lead to the cross.
- Restore. Christ restored Peter after he denied him. If Peter can be restored, so can you and anyone else.
- DO NOT use your recent experiences as sermon fodder or illustrations. People see through this and I do not believe God is glorified when we use the sacred desk as a bully pulpit to do publicly what we do not have the guts to do in private.
How do you deal with disappointments in the flock God has called you to serve?
