The days are long, but the years are short.
These are wise words that were spoken to Angela and I when our kids were younger. Our oldest son turned fifteen last week, and I was reminded again of the sage wisdom. Some days as a parent seem to last a month. And yet, as holidays roll arounds or birthdays are celebrated, we all find ourselves sounding more and more like our parents, “they sure do grow up fast.”
My days are numbered with my kids. From birth to eighteen (when we sort of hope they will begin to leave the nest), I have about 936 weekends. 936 Saturdays. 936 Sundays. Actually, I don’t even have all of those. Of the 936 Saturdays that my kids will spend on this earth during their first 18 years, many of them will be spent away from me. I may travel, they might go to a friend’s house or visit with grandparents.
My 936 gets cut down to 836 or 736. If you happen to be a family separated by divorce, you may only have your kids half of those days. Maybe your number is 400 or 425.
Depressed yet?
I hope not. I’m not writing to depress anyone, just to remind you all that the days may be long, but the years are short. Because the years are short, it is imperative that we invest all we can in the years that we have.
In our family, one of our efforts at investment is to get away from screens regularly and spend time enjoying each other. That means we love walks and sports. It also means that we have to double-down on entertainment ideas that keep us away from the television.
That’s why we bought a fire pit.
Angela and I wanted to create an excuse to be outside together. But, we also are realistic. Sometimes, our kids find us boring and sometimes getting them away from screens is a fight.
But, kids don’t find fire boring.
They love everything about fire. They love building fires, poking the fire, and even putting out the fire. Kids love s’mores and hotdogs over an open flame. Give them an opportunity, and your kids will even find joy and satisfaction splitting wood and adding it to the fire.
We bought a fire pit because we believe in family and we believe it is our job to instill in our kids a love for Jesus and each other.
Consider God’s words to the Hebrews during the Exodus:
4 “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.[b]5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
Exodus 6:4-9
We bought a fire pit because we believe that discipleship should happen in the normal course of every day life. We believe that kids learn dominion as they cut and split wood. We believe that fellowship around an open fire opens the door for intentional dialogue. We have heard our kids open up about their joys, their fears, and their failures when their attention is focused on dancing flames.
We believe that Saturday nights are great times to slow down and prepare our hearts for Sunday worship.
Should you invest in a fire pit?
Not necessarily, but you better invest in your kids. You better invest in your family. You don’t have to buy a fire pit, but you must find ways to invest in your kids; to teach them diligently as you sit and as you walk and when you lie down.
Remember, you have 936 Saturdays. Unless you are reading this today with 9 year old, in which case you have half that many. Time is fleeting. You have opportunities and responsibilities, but you don’t have forever.
I don’t like roasted marshmallows. But I love time with my kids uninterrupted by television and video games. I love burning paper plates instead of washing dishes. And, I love that after the kids go to bed, sometimes I get to sneak a few minutes alone by the fire with my wife…the woman God gave to me and our children.
We bought a fire pit because we wanted an excuse to be together and build memories as a family.
What excuses are you creating to spend time with your family?
Craig, as always, your words touch my heart and bring me to tears. Our oldest just turned 15 as well, and I am trying to soak up every minute with him and his sisters. Thank you for your words of wisdom and your witness to your own children and the rest of us!