The family unit is the most basic of relationships spelled out in the Bible. Even before the church, God instituted marriage. The relationship between husband and wife is a regular topic of discussion within the church and is often mentioned in the Bible. Husbands are primarily to love and lead as in their home and wives are primarily to love and serve.
Though God’s word offers instruction and guidance on how to live together as husband and wife, I often find couples frustrated and overwhelmed at the effort needed to live together as husband and wife in accordance with God’s word. Husbands struggle to lead spiritually and devote their time and attention at home. Wives struggle to keep up with the demands that constantly come with motherhood.
On top of the self-imposed demands of motherhood many women are overwhelmed with the need to be a “Proverbs 31 Woman.”
Who can blame women for being a bit overwhelmed. There are books and ministries built around this ideal woman as set forth in the last chapter of Proverbs. This woman is amazing. She works outside of the home (gasp!), she provides for her family, she has the unfettered trust of her husband, she gets up before daylight and prepares food for her household, she sews, she is a real-estate mogul, she plants vineyards, keeps the lights on, feeds the poor and needy, and makes certain that her husband is well-known. Does she ever sleep?
Of course her children call her blessed. Who wouldn’t?
Women read Proverbs 31, listen to popular women’s speakers, read women’s books, and immerse themselves in the caustic culture of Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and the blogosphere and declare themselves unfit as mothers and wives. I have news for all of the women reading this:
- Not every book that claims to be Christian is biblical.
- Social media is a liar.
- Blogs are misleading.
- The enemy wants you to doubt your ability to love your family well.
Women should strive to live up to the example set forth in Proverbs 31, but not all in one day. The Proverbs 31 woman accomplished much in a lifetime, and so will you.
People say that the secret to a good man is a good woman behind him. I believe that Proverbs 31 shows that the secret to a Proverbs 31 wife is a Proverbs 31 husband.
How can a woman accomplish all that is set forth in Proverbs 31? With the help of a man who will love, lead, and support her. Proverbs 31:31 shows that a godly man makes certain that his wife is rewarded for her works. Women often work only to provide for their children and spouses. Husbands need to make certain that wives receive some personal reward for her work. Men should also make sure that their wives are honored publicly for their work.
The secret to a good man is a good woman, and the world should know the works of the woman behind the man. The woman who works diligently to serve her family well should be praised for her works. Men, do not take your wife’s contributions to the family for granted, praise her often and publicly. Reward her efforts by speaking her love language to her.
Proverbs 31 shows the reciprocal nature of marriage.
The woman who seeks the good and success of her husband should not be surprised to discover that her husband supports her in all of her efforts and praises her for her service and success.
Ladies, do you want to have a Proverbs 31 man who supports and encourages you? Work to be a Proverbs 31 wife. Men, do you want to have a Proverbs 31 wife? Work to be a Proverbs 31 husband.
